April 9th, 2018

[Interlude]

Let’s go back to the beginning…

I came to Vancouver Island to change my life.. After many years of trying to pull myself together, my family intervened and persuaded me to get help. On the day of my intervention, I remember tuning out my family’s letters to me. What I did hear that day was the voice of my best friend. He died in my arms from an overdose and his mom was at my intervention. She spoke as if she was him and I listened. That was April 8th, 2011.

I was in treatment for 9 months that year. I completed treatment and took the suggestion of staying on Vancouver Island. My mom said I had two choices move back homeĀ  to Vermont and die or stay on the Island and make it work. I slowly started to rediscover a healthy sense of self. I loved playing soccer with my new friends and loved the excitement of scoring goals. I started to attend the pottery drop-in at the city’s Bowen recreational facility. I loved being present with the clay. It was always something I loved and wished I could be better at. I was drawn to the messiness and to the mindfulness it took to make something.

One of my first pots

April 9th, 2012.
At 12 months clean/sober its a tradition to tell your story. To carry a message of hope and allow others to hear what it was like for you. I remember being incredibly anxious and then an unnerving sense of calmness. I told my story. Afterwards, Kendall came up to me and thanked me for sharing. She related to my story as it was similar to her brother’s story. I remember feeling flattered and shy.
I thanked her for sharing with me how it impacted her.

A few days later Kendall posted this song on YouTube and she dedicated it to me!

“Make it stop” by Kendall Patrick